Give Presence

Photo site: 45th and U Dist Library, Seattle

Empathy and nonviolent communication for healing relationships as described by Dominic Barter in the Empathy Documentary Project, really got to me.

Consider the gift of being present this holiday season; for empathy can transform the person being truly "heard" and that encourages growth. When we reflect back another's presence we can empower them to see for themselves how they are able to change. We hear ourselves better when others hear us. That is beautiful.

This is a gift, a new tool that we can share sustainably. As we understand more the limits of our current situation we need new tools and practices. (Einstein law of repetition -"The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results".)

We are a civilization in need of responsive adaptation to a reality that was unknown when we started building the systems that now control our very lives. If the super food of life is our giving of presence to each other then go forth and give abundantly. This is about living in an understanding of connected reality and that changes the paradigm.

I am personally coming from a place of not being heard aka, being misunderstood. I felt i was rarely validated for who i was, but for who i appeared to be, even though i was the one that set up that persona.

I tried to reflect in life a collage person of fashion and glamorous decadence. i pieced myself together from the sound bites, movie clips and images that i responded to. But when i was perceived as such, i felt very alone. I fought back by looking for cracks in everyone i cared about. I thought that way i would find the truth but instead i just broke things.

Then i tried to assert my transforming self and that made matters worse. I think i came on like a shipwrecked alien, people, men especially, couldn't relate. I started to experiment with life because what i had believed in proved to be lossy, and there had to be more. I had faith in 'the more."

If being truly heard can evoke healing and if listening emphatically to others helps us see our common beingness, then that means we can transform at the rate needed to overcome the wrong mindedness that appears so dominate and deadly. This transformative action is something we can all do every day.

We can transcend our primitive past and come towards our becoming. We can bloom in spirit, love and gratitude.

I am challenging myself and others to start gifting the world with presence. Lets experiment with it, and share our stories, let's see what happens. Cheers!